Mona Shores 4 EGR 3 (OT)

Those who consider the Raving Reporter to be a long winded blowhard and a danger to the purity of the game are encouraged to stop reading HERE and skip to the next story.

As humans, God blessed us with opposable thumbs. This is so that we can text message one another. When you have to submit your hockey scores to a multitude of reporting agencies such as the WMHSHB, texting is indispensable. And since a raving reporter should be constantly trying to improve himself, I am considering taking one of the “Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick Text Messaging For Those Who Can’t Text Very Good” classes now on sale. In just two months, Kwame and his chief of staff (I won’t touch that one) texted over 14,000 times! That’s 233 messages per day! Hopefully, the generous constituents of Detroit had the good sense to purchase unlimited texting for Kwame and his Kween.

For Mona Shores, one antidote for being on the wrong end of the scoreboard lately was to get out of Detroit! When you play game after game against powerful teams who draw players from a vast metropolitan area and Canada, you tend to lose your perspective. Coming back to OK Tier 1 hockey has helped put things back in proper perspective for the Sailors. Two games, two conference wins; Ch-Ch-Ch-Chia!

Friday night’s game at the Patterson between EGR and MS was ripe with hype. Many believed the Sailors to be vulnerable, not just emotionally, but also in hockey. EGR has been playing strongly lately, with wins over Rockford, Jenison, Hudsonville, Mattawan, and the mighty mighty Falcons of EK at the close of January. Shores has been up, down, and sideways, coming off a difficult Showcase showing just a week ago. The Pioneers student section had been resting their voices for days, speaking with notecards and other non verbal communication in the days before Friday’s contest, then cutting loose somewhere around the decibel level of a sandblaster at four feet as the game commenced.

Shores started strong, holding the puck in the Pioneers end with all out hustle and a sense of urgency. EGR started slowly, like a fat kid in a footrace. It wasn’t until 9:39 on the scoreboard, when EGR finally brought the puck into the Sailor zone, only to be whistled for offsides. Meanwhile, again and again the Sailors entertained their loved ones with opportunities, but an inability to finish against Senior goalie Ian McDonald. At 8:19, Coppock fed Taylor “Moore Ice Time” Moore in front of McDonald, with the puck skidding off Moore’s stick. Then at 10:53, Tyler “Mugatu” McCarl from Ryan “Earthen Berm-Meister” hit a size 13 skate in front of the net. With 3:31 remaining, Moore dished to Grevel, streaking through the quad and toward the net, but just behind his stick as he couldn’t gather it in.

The second period started with much promise for the Sailors. At 1:20, the Sailors tested the reinforced netting in the back of the Pioneer goal, on a shot by Bret “Grevel-Headed” Grevel from David “Chicken of the C” Coppock and Kyle “Fleas and Hicks.” Up by one, the team suddenly remembered that they were on mid-winter break and agreed to take the rest of the second period off, perhaps to rest up for the third. While they were dozing, EGR took target practice on Scottie “SpecialTee” Teifenthal, ringing up three goals over 8:26. Captain Cory Domin, Ecko Morgan Ecko Morgan Ecko Morgan (sorry, can’t stop myself), and Phil Conrad all took home souvenir pucks as they stretched the Pioneer lead to 3-1 over the disconsolate Sailors, the final goal coming with somewhere between :01 and :00 remaining on the scoreboard, depending upon whether you were a Pioneer or a Sailor’s fan.

But as you may recall from your own High School Hockey (HSH) days, there are 3 periods of hockey to be played at this level, and the third period was of course stamped “Property of the Sailors.” With 13:32 remaining, Tiefenthal, in Brodeur-like fashion, fired a quick outlet pass to Hicks, who head-manned to Coppock, who whirled in the EGR zone and backhanded the puck to Moore, who quickly sent it to its home, in the Pioneer net. 3-2 EGR. Four minutes later, at 5:47 in the third, Andrew “Ulf Samuelson” Ulfsax, from the near boards and between the red and blue line, turned and cocked his shooting arm to dump the puck into the zone. As he fired, it appeared that McDonald may have been screened, distracted, or in a fugue state, and just like that, the anchors were away and the game was tied at 3.

Enter male model and Mlive Mr. Hockey candidate Tyler McCarl, who at 4:56 in OT, with students, coaches, parents, fans, colicky babies, hecklers, and his dad screaming random instructions at the top of their lungs, took a pass from the generous Kyle Hicks, crossed parallel to the net from right to left on your radio, and ripped off a sickening wrister in what may have been the first shot of his career that stayed low to the ice. Game, set, and match, McCarl & Mona Shores.

Final shots for the game including OT favored the Sailors at 31 - 21. For the Sailors, the hit of the game came at from Tyler “Greevy Baby” Grevious, who at 10:29 of the first period, hit a Pioneer so solidly that an adjuster was called in from the stands to determine whether or not he should be declared totaled.