Mona, Mora and a set of steak knives.

This being the first year the MS raving reporter has experienced HSHP (High School Hockey Playoffs), I wasn’t sure of what to expect. As team communications director (a move the MS board now admits may have been a serious mistake), I’m also hit with a lot of questions about Pre-Regionals vs. Regionals, why we play MCC & Grand Haven back to back (who are not in Tier 1), how the Divisions are set up, who named it the OK Conference, which makes it sound just mediocre, etc...

To get answers, I called my friend Jim Mora, former NFL Coach of the Year, who went to the playoffs 6 times with the Saints and Colts (and also went “oh for” in the playoffs). Hockey moms who watch Lifetime Network during NFL games and are unfamiliar with his response to my questions are encouraged to click here:



Hockey dads who have seen the commercial no less than 25 times while watching the hapless Lions are encouraged to watch the Iverson vs. Mora version of Practice vs. Playoff’s here:



Even Mora’s words of wisdom proved fruitless against the Mustangs of Portage Central as for two plus periods, they trampled the Sailors and sent a dejected team and fans home from the Annex in Kalamazoo on Saturday night, on the wrong end of a 4-1 regional final game. The Mustangs played inspired hockey, determined to avenge last years 6-1 loss to the Sailors at the same rink in the same regional finals but with a different cast, crew and younger fans (by at least a year). 2008 was a different story for the Sailors. I'm reminded of Alec Baldwin in Glengarry Glen Ross: “You have been weighed, measured and been found wanting,” (also Daniel 5:27 - Blogger made it to church today - no hockey). Second prize, as you know, in the Glengarry sales contest was a set of steak knives. First prize to the Mustangs Saturday was the Regional hockey trophy, which Portage Central coach, Economics & P.E. teacher Jim Murray proudly accepted and handed off to his captains. The Sailors never really could mount an effective attack against the Mustangs, who outworked, out-shot, and controlled the puck at both ends of the ice for the better part of three periods. Chris Sandmeyer, #7, also out-danced the Sailors during pre-game warmups.

Portage Central dads, who did a magnificent job of decorating the annex to fire up their Mustangs (are helium balloons legal in MHSAA playoffs?) wasted little time in revealing that they came to claim hardware. In less time than it takes Wesley Snipes to fill out his federal tax returns, Portage Central leveraged a MS penalty for the games’ opening PP goal at 10:30 in the first period. Erik Hoffman took advantage of a rejected shot and resubmitted it to the net for the officials’ consideration, assisted by his linemates Jared Hook and Cody Vanderveen. Two of the first three Mustang goals were with a man advantage as penalties combined with lethargic play equaled doom for the Sailors. PC had the Sailors reeling all period, outshooting MS by a wide margin and testing Scottie “False Tief” Tiefenthal for the duration of the 45 minute contest.

Not content, the Mustangs continued to look like studs against the Sailors, adding two more goals in the second period to the delight of the large, raucous home audience. Many of the PC fans were dressed in their blue and gold jerseys to overwhelm and outnumber the one Shores fan, Craig “Burrito” Skocelas, who was similarly dressed in the classic MS hockey jersey for the game. An even strength goal on a pass across the front of the net to Tiefenthal’s left found #17, Erik Hoffman, who fans may have remembered from the PC goal seven minutes prior, who shoveled it into the net for what would be the game winner at 2:15 from Jared Hook. Mustang backers barely had time to rest their voices and hands from all that yelling and clapping when less than three minutes later, PC struck again on the PP, as Hook skated from right to left across the high slot and snuck a low forehand by Tiefenthal. Aggressive forechecking by the Mustangs kept MS on their heels through the first two periods of play, after which a comfortable lead allowed the hosts to rest on their laurels and dump the puck.

The lone bright spot for the Sailors occurred in the third period, when “Ry IQ” Ryan Burmeister sent a backhand high and outside but still in the strike zone of sophomore Brogan Vandevelde’s net. Burmeister was supported by Tyler “TiMac” McCarl and J “See You in the Box Score” Boyd with 10:02 remaining. But before Sailor fans could fantasize about a Hollywood comeback, a defensive lapse required Brendan “It Like Beckham” Sturr to dive and stretch to play the puck on a Mustang player flying toward Tiefenthal, resulting in a tripping call and rally killer for Shores. A game ending empty netter by Sandmeyer closed the books for the game with :17 remaining. Vandevelde, according to the PC scorekeeper, absorbed 23 shots for the Mustangs and gave back very few rebounds throughout the game. Tiefenthal, it was noted, kept the final score from being 28 to 1 by saving 24 shots.

Finally, the last hit of the game for the 2007/08 Mona Shores Sailors...in a game which didn’t feature a whole lot of hitting, was awarded once again to Drew “Bury You More” Skocelas, who actually took out two Mustangs for the price of one just outside the Sailor blue line at 12:45 of the second period, hitting the PC victims so hard that the resulting electro-magnetic pulse briefly took out the lights, sound system, and battery powered watches throughout the Annex.

Congratulations to the Mustangs & best of luck at Georgetown! Special thanks to the Blogmaster for tolerating the unconventional rantings of a mad-blogger, to the MS coaches, and also to the Sailors players for being such good sports and entertaining me far more than I could ever entertain you all season. Also thanks to my son, who will never know how proud of him I am for playing through a nagging injury all season and leaving it all on the ice. I fear for the Sailor opponents in the OK Tier 1 conference next year!